Corrupt a Wish (forum game)

Granted. They're made of live crabs and you can't bring yourself to harm the cute little crustaceans. You decide to go hungry instead.

I wish for a submarine.

Granted, but you don't know how to pilot it and end up crashing into a colony of cute lttle crustaceans.

I wish Spore would load faster.

Granted. It loads so fast it crashed your computer, and you need to get a new one.

I wish for a candy cane. (I was going to do Gelatino's, but I wasn't fast enough. I was going to say it was a sandwich.)

Granted. Santa Claus hunts you down in search of the stolen candy cane.

I wish for good, new book to read.

Granted though your new book only has half pages of words. The rest are blank.

I wish I could *rub* out my mistakes.

You are arrested and put on a life-sentence for initiating genocide against the mistakes.

I wish Wikipedia would stop being a jerk and let everyone on it already.

No one understands what SOPA will do and everyone votes for it and it kills your internets.

I wish it would stop snowing.

It hails instead.

I wish for free refills.

((Terwynd, you can still access Wikipedia with a mobile device.))

You drink too much and get a serious stomachache.

I wish it was snowing.

I come to your house and brutally murder you for wishing that.

I wish I had a chainsaw to brutally murder Mitch with.

Granted. During the ensuing battle, I steal the chainsaw from you and...well, connect the dots.

I wish I hadn't wished it was snowing.

Granted. You wished a piano fell on you from the sky instead and... Well... Yeah.

I wish trollface wouldn't troll me.

Granted, now a Y U NO face won't leave you alone.

I wish I would do good on my English paper.

Granted. You didn't do good on your paper, but you did do a small amount of good in the world by taking out the trash, which smelled like heck's garbage disposal.

I wish I didn't have a small amount of stage fright.

Granted. You now have a massivly large amount of stagefright.

I wish I didn't procrastonate so much.

Granted, in your haste to do everything you wanted to do you trip and break your neck.

I wish ghosts weren't stalking me.

Granted. They decide to move in for the kill instead.

I wish for a cheeseburger.

Granted. The cheeseburger had E. coli in it, and you became deathly ill.

I wish I wouldn't worry so much.

Granted. You become paranoid.
I wish for a pony.

Granted. There was a serial killer hiding inside the pony..

I wish for a hug.

Granted. The hug is so strong it breaks your ribs.

I wish for a pencil sharpener.

Granted. Your pencil's break.

I wish for a robot bee.

Granted. It flies away and you shout "NO! MY ROBOT BEEEE!

I wish for a flying fish.

Granted, it flies out the window.

I wish for a magical raccoon

Granted. You get strangled.
I wish I had Need For Speed Most Wanted.